…which led me to Connie Chiu.
This is too boring to sustain my interest yet the only google search that might directly affect my safety. I’m gonna die.
Like most people (slash let’s be real,
white bloggers), I heard about V Nasty via Kreayshawn’s Gucci Gucci going viral on tumblr. I became momentarily obsessed with the rapper and then less than momentarily nervous about said obsession. I couldn’t tell if I had a “girl crush” on her, i.e what straight women say when they admire another woman, or a real crush, i.e wanting to bang it out with her. And if it was just a girl crush, was it because I was excited to see a white girl rap? None of this has been resolved, although I think I’m still DTF.
One ambiguity I have not been able to table is the controversy surrounding V Nasty and her use of “n*gga”. I had assumed after watching a video Kreayshawn made of her cantering around the Bay on a warm day smoking weed and harassing men from The Town, that V Nasty was biracial. However, V Nasty is part of Kreayshawn’s White Girl Mob, which in part has caused others to assume that V Nasty is white. Fair; race is about identification, both by self and by others, so differing assumptions about V Nasty’s race is to be expected. Yet, depending on how V Nasty’s race is read, the word becomes more or less offensive.
Kreayshawn says, “I never said it in any of my music. Ever. [You heard it in my music video?] It might have been my sister, V-Nasty ’cause she says it all the time. That’s just because she grew up all different. Like, she goes in and out of jail for armed robbery all the time. Like, her mom calls her that. So that’s her stuff. Personally, I don’t say it in my music. It’s not my place but you know, that’s her.”
But that’s not what interests me; I’m mainly interested in how V Nasty has decided to respond to the outcry, how pretty much every website identifies her as white and the hilarious dude trying SO HARD in her video.
So after some important research, I have found out the basic premise of the film: a college student in Australia is strapped for cash and engages in high class, high art sex work. There’s a difficult-to-watch scene at the beginning of the film involving the protagonist, played by Emily Browning, swallowing a balloon for a medical experiment. According to someone who sounds like they have the same pointless major as me, this scene is supposed to demonstrate the disconnect Browning feels from her body and foreshadow her impending prostitution. The trick? Taking rohypnol so that extremely wealthy old men can act out their nastiest fantasies on her lifeless body. Then comes a slew of wrinkled and wagging penises (no penetration allowed, however) and beautiful but sterile cinematography. But since I’m a sucker for bizarre sexual predilections, I’ll def be checking this out.
A recent conversation prompted this search and according to the internet, vaginas definitely can bleach underwear. There is very little written specifically on the topic aside from several worried ladies anonymously asking the world why their underwear has lightened near their vulvas. As with many gyno-centric health issues, there is no definitive reason given. However, most commenters believe it may have to do with the vagina’s pH balance.
Vaginas range from acidic to basic. Acidity in a woman’s discharge might bleach her underwear. According to one website, “a healthy vagina generally tends towards a more acidic pH, ideally between 4.2 and 5.” One woman’s discharge is so acidic it eats hole in her panties.
Another woman says that her urine is the culprit, smelling strongly of ammonia and bleaching her underwear. While acidity might protect against unwanted bacteria, extremes on either side of the spectrum can signal a health concern. One woman says that everything from parasites to drinking too much pop may cause a pH imbalance.
According to this awesome review, Cheryl LLoyd—whom I had already known about—collaborated with Will.I.Am to create this hot mess of a song based on what sounds like the dumbest slang term of all time. The website insinuates that “swagger jagger” predates Lloyd’s career and means “someone who is always cramping your style.” However, after cross-referencing this article with Urban Dictionary, I found the majority of the definitions of “swagger jagger” pertained to Lloyd’s song. A few top definitions include:
A shit, pointless song with stupid lyrics made by Cher Lloyd
Me: You heard that song Swagger Jagger? You: Yeah, it’s fucking shit.”
A miss interpretation/ Miss hearing of “Swagger Jacker”.
Commonly misheard by uneducated, illiterate teenagers, who think they are “Gangstar as F***”.
The term is infact Swagger JACKER: Someone who “Jacks” your look, style, sound etc… Taking it and passing it of as their own look/Material/ Shit, Etc….
I’m glad to see that while Swagger Jagger has reached #1 on the UK charts, an outspoken group of Brits deem this song a “national laughing stock and an embarrassment to this country.”